Vajazzling!

Take a look at this: Vajazzling.com. The gist of it is: a lady gets a full Brazilian and then she has crystals glued to her area. OK.
File this one under "Honey, you're trying too hard." I realize that for a good number of women the thought process ends at "SPARKLY GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" and to those women I say if you spend money on this kind of thing you are just the worst kind of moron. I may not be the world's greatest expert on snatch but I really don't think you need to try that hard to impress a penis. If you're a lesbian I don't know; maybe this kind of idiocy flies in that community but I doubt it.

From what I gather there are a few different styles of vajazzling available to to you. There are little shapes or pictures or words or some such you can have glued to your cooch:

Then there is what I'm going to call "the glitter merkin":

I'm sorry Ma'am, it looks like you have

a very serious case of GLAMydia.

Oh, and then there's this:

I love the feel of your complete lack of 

common sense chafing against my balls, sweetheart.

I really can't get over how tastelessly ridiculous this is. Best case scenario, you've wasted your time and money and your partner is distracted and confused. Worst case, they may think you're a vampire.
Apparently we have Jennifer Love Hewitt to blame for this trend. In an interview (on Lopez Tonight I feel I should mention) she talks about how she was depressed after a break-up. A friend of hers "Swarovski crystalled [her] precious lady and it shined  like a disco ball". She goes on: "women should vajazzle their vajajays". Wow. Maybe next time I'm feeling down I'll dip my balls in glitter and see how that goes.

Yeah, something like that.